Comradery Vs. Social Anxiety

The comradery that is felt among concert-goers enhances the experience and keeps the fans coming together time and time again. Before they arrive at a venue, they have a common bond—a shared love (or at least liking) of music. Many times fans dress similarly or wear other band shirts of different bands that people around might be fans of as well. This helps people feel like they fit in and may even encourage conversation. There is not much room left for judgment (figuratively and literally since everyone is standing shoulder-to-shoulder). Plus, what better place is there to discuss music than at a concert in-between sets?

However, people with similar taste in music do not always get along, especially when there is alcohol involved. Personalities are still different and they still change while under the influence. Not everyone gets nicer. It is not unusual to see security escorting a couple of people out for fighting. Fights that break out are a disturbance to the positive energy of the comradery, but just the fact that there are so many of them creates fear for easygoing fans.

Image credit: jugbo

For those that struggle with anxiety, like myself, being surrounded by people with no easy way to escape already heightens claustrophobia. Then having to worry about a bunch of muscular guys throwing their bodies around and getting caught up in a mosh pit makes it difficult to fully enjoy the show.

In order to get the full feeling of comradery without the anxiety, there are a a couple of notes to keep in mind.

• Go with as many people as possible: It is just simply safer to have more eyes to look out for personal belongings and physical well-being. This is particularly true for the ladies. Plus, there is more force to help keep the mosh pit contained.
• Location is key: Being front and center is awesome, but remember that is a hot spot for rowdy behavior. Far left and right are usually calmer and provide an easier escape from an unwanted situation or to a bathroom or beverage break. In smaller venues, the back can even be a great spot. It provides all the freedom from enclosure while still getting a decent view. 

Remember, live music is fun. It is the responsibility of every concert-goer to keep the comradery alive. It is not that people cannot drink or get a little rowdy. It is just more important to be considerate because not only does everyone there have a similar taste in music, but they are similarly human beings. 

About This Blog

My family is not a family of musicians, but I am a musical prodigy. There are stories of my grandpa Milnes and his sister getting yelled at by their mom for doing nothing but sitting around and listening to records. Then there are the frequent reminders by my dad as to how some of his fondest memories of my grandpa are those of them sharing CDs. Now, my dad and I share an iTunes library and sometimes spend hours in front of the television watching music videos and debating our own Top 10 lists.

I was conditioned to have such educated music-related discussions from an early age. Growing up, my dad would quiz me and reward me with small cash prizes (a dollar or two) for correctly naming the artist of a selected song. We stopped playing once I became too knowledgeable for his wallet.

The Milnes musical experience goes beyond our household, however. My dad and I have spent just as many hours in front of a stage as we have on YouTube. We go to at least two rock shows a year.

This frequent concert-going started when I was 17. My dad and I went to Indianapolis to see my favorite band, Chevelle. It was so incredible I became addicted.

Since then I have gone out of my way to see bands such as Taproot, Taking Back Sunday, Thursday, The Almost, The Classis Crime, Madina Lake, Enter Shikari, In This Moment, Motionless In White, Avenged Sevenfold, Deftones, Bush, Soundgarden, Alien Ant Farm, Fuel, Powerman 5000, and (Hed) P.E. to name some major ones.

I also attended Vans Warped Tour 2012 and 2013 and all three of 103.9 The Bear’s Big Growls.

During my time in the various venues and crowds, I learned a lot about live music. Despite how entertaining rock shows are, they are not always enjoyable. It is interesting how something so awesome can be so awful at the same time.

My aim for this blog is to provide other live music lovers with proper concert-going etiquette as well as helpful tips on how to get that indescribable feeling of viewing a favorite band up close and personal without ending up in the hospital or having to wipe the beer out of their eyes first.

Image credit: Personal photo by author